After yesterday’s Problem Child by Hed Ogledd, a rarely played, but beautiful, pathos-rich song from the perspective of an outsider, perhaps with a physical or mental disability, looking at other children playing. R.E.M. of course became something of a rock band behemoth after 1992’s Automatic For The People, but this track, and written collaboratively by Peter Buck, Bill Berry, Mike Mills, and Michael Stipe, is thought to only been played once live, and closes the A-side of 1988’s Green album. Sometimes it is very rewarding to look back at earlier material of a band that hit massive mainstream success. The mandolin dominates on this song, and its melody and closing chords enhance that feeling of something suspended and unresolved. Written the child as narrator, looking the other children playing and laughing at him, it could be that he is physicality disabled, deformed or perhaps has a form of autism, a pariah among peers, unable to fully comprehend what is going on, just looking to make everything “OK” and coping through an internal dialogue of “I told my friend myself.”
I've watched the children come and go
A late long march into spring
I sit and watch those children
Jump in the tall grass
Leap the sprinkler
Walk in the ground
Bicycle clothespin spokes
The sound, the smell of swingset hands
I will try to sing a happy song
I'll try and make a happy game to play
Come play with me I whispered to my new found friend
Tell me what it's like to go outside
I've never been
Tell me what it's like to just go outside
I've never been
And I never will
And I'm not supposed to be like this
I'm not supposed to be like this
But it's OK.
Hey, those kids are looking at me
I told my friend myself
Those kids are looking at me
They're laughing and they're running over here
They're laughing and they're running over here
What do I do?
What can I do?
What should I do?
What do I say?
What can I say?
I said I'm not supposed to be like this
Let's try to find a happy game to play[x2]
I'm not supposed to be like this
But it's OK, OK.
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