By George Boyland
Having happily done this job about thirty times without breaching the fourth wall, I'm going to do it now. This is me talking; George, sonofwebcore, whatever you prefer to call me. I've had experience of suicides, and to be honest, it's generally something I've put behind me. You go home to your wife and kids and try to forget about it. But can you? You wake up at four in the morning and cuddle your partner, glad that you are conscious.
As someone who was close to death, without realising it, only a couple of months ago, I feel I have a little insight into the fear. I wasn't scared for myself, strangely, the hospital staff were super, though I was terrified that Linda might wake up next to a stiff.
I chose this topic because even though I should have been well used to the consequences, I wasn't sure why people would want to take their lives. It wasn't a frivolous decision. However, the reaction to this this topic, on the blog, blew my boots off. Some people didn't want to get involved, some were very cautious, others turned out to be health professionals offering guidance to those who needed it. It's all positive.
Some of our regulars, and some I haven't known for long, told us of their flirting with the unknown, which actually choked me up.
My old mate's son did the deed. The mate is a good guy, his wife is a saint, but their lad, full of champers and charlie, hanged himself, supposedly over his missus.
Anyway, the tunes; I'm not going to comment on each one. I think in this case the music stands on its own. People kill themselves for numerous incredible reasons, and I've tried to pick firstly music that I like, and secondly lyrics that express something that I feel is close to our topic. I had thought of listing all the different feelings human beings might have before taking that final step:but no, here is the music …
The A-List Playlist:
The Ruts - In A Rut
Groanbox - Hobo Heaven
Bjork - Hope
Oumou Sangare - Yere Faga
The Raconteurs - Top Yourself
Leadbelly - Goodnight Irene
Kate Rusby - The Drowned Lovers
The Rubberbandits - Sonny
Karen Matheson - Ailein Duinn
Frightened Rabbit - Floating In The Forth
The Smiths - Asleep
The Flamin' Groovies - Slow Death
David Bowie - Rock 'N' Roll Suicide
The B-List Playlist:
Gary Jules - Mad World
Joy Division - Exercise One
The Fray - How To Save A Life
The Pixies - Mr Grieves
Logic - 1 - 800 - 273 - 8255
Teddy Thompson - Turning The Gun On Myself
Dolly Parton - The Bridge
Buzzcocks - Love You More
The Mothers Of Invention - Stuff Up The Cracks
Eliza Carthy - Sheath And Knife
The Smashing Pumpkins - Today
Jackie Leven - Young Male Suicide Blessed By Invisible Woman
Gilbert O'Sullivan - Alone Again (Naturally)
My Wildcard Pick:
Rainer Ptacek - Life Is Fine
These playlists were inspired by readers' song nominations from last week's topic: Back to black: songs about suicide. The next topic will launch on Thursday at 1pm UK time.
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Going through a tough time? Need to talk to someone? Contact The Samaritans or similar charitable organisations who are there to listen. There is always someone who cares.